Every Cut and Scrape
by fairfarrenlovelylydia
Summary: Alice teaches Tarrant how to ride a bicycle. Chaos and fun insue. F for pure Fluff and Fun


**So I haven't written pure fluff in awhile. And I really needed to do that. This was inspired by a couple riding on the old banana boat style bikes in a picture I saw over on tumblr. Here it is!**

* * *

"What in Time do you call this contraption?" Tarrant asked as he eyed the metal bike that Alice had brought out from the shed. She had asked Mirana if there was anyway that she could get her hands on the transportation she had grown to love while staying at Margaret's.

"This is a bicycle," Alice said with a look at her husband. "And it's a way of having the most brilliant kind of fun." She took hold of the wide handle bars. She was surprised with how fast the monarch was able to get her hands on the bicycles.

"How does one even _use _this to have fun," Tarrant eyed the dark color bicycle with wary green eyes. Alice sighed and shook her blonde curls.

"It's simple," Alice explained as she held the bike between her hands. "You place you leg over the other side as if you are riding a horse except you have to move your legs like so in order to actually move the bicycle."

"What is the point? Why would I not choose to walk over getting on this...metal thing?"

"Because it is fun," Alice replied indignantly. She smoothed out the front of her green frock. She was excited to be able to ride her bicycle along the roads of the Tugely Woods. She was a little deflated by the fact that her husband did not share the same enthusiasm.

"If you insist." Tarrant sighed. He swung his leg over the skinny metal frame in the same manner Alice did and settled his pinstriped clad rear on the round seat. He shifted uncomfortably on the horn of the bike seat. "This made little curve needs to leave or my tea bags are going to be a bit jostled."

Alice turned red as he mentioned his manhood issue but she kept a straight face as she bit her lip. "It is supposed to help keep your legs separate. It will help with them from becoming bruised if we hit a bump." Alice said with a small chuckle.

"Fine," Tarrant looked down at the pedals with an uncomfortable glance. "And these are equivilant to stirrups, I take it."

"They are," Alice said with the proud nod of her head. "If we stop and dissect every part of this bicycle we're not going to have enough daylight to ride." She said with the roll of her eyes. She placed her left foot on the pedal and gently pushed forward, placing the other foot smoothly on the other pedal. "It's easy. Just put both feet on and push them."

Tarrant looked at her moving forward with a determined glance. He placed his left orange boot on the pedal.

"No, you have to-" Alice shouted as she saw her husband making a painful mistake. He lifted his other foot up without pushing off and promptly he and the bicycle crashed to the ground.

"Tha's ah loahd ah fun?" He growled from below the bicycle frame. "Mo' like ah way tah injure teh enemy."

"Oh, Tare," Alice said sympathetically as she dropped her bicycle to the dust and went to her husband. She helped him scramble out from beneath the frame and set it upright as he stood, brushing the dust and dirt from his yellow waistcoat and lilac colored dress shirt. He then bent down to pick up his signature top hat and placed it harshly upon his red waves.

"I think you might just need a bit of help this go around," Alice said with a sigh. Tarrant looked at her with a doubt glare. "We can master this together."

"This is impossible," Tarrant grumbled as he remounted the bicycle, his feet he stomped firmly on the ground on either side.

"Precisely," Alice said as she stood on her tip toes, her hand braced on his forearm, to place a kiss on his cheek. "Make it the conquerable one of the day."

Tarrant sighed as he placed his foot on the pedal; his stained and scarred hands gripping fiercely to the handlebars. "I am going to hold on with you as we push forward." Alice explained.

"I feel like a bairn," Tarrant sighed as he attempted to put his other foot on the pedal.

"No! Not yet Tarrant!" Alice cried as she clumsily caught hold of the handlebars so he did not tip over. "You have to push forward first."

Tarrant groaned and placed his right foot on back on the ground. He then pushed forward with it and the wheels of the bicycle began to move. His green eyes widened in wonder and his gap tooth smile returned to his red lips. "Look, my fair one! I am moving!"

"Right you are but you better apply that foot or you will not be travelling forward for long." She said quickly.

Tarrant applied the opposite foot and pushed down. Alice began a light jog as she held onto the handlebars. "This is quite fun," He replied with a laugh.

"If I let go it may be even more fun." Alice said with a huff from running besides the bicycle.

"Then by all means, mo muirnín," He purred and Alice quickly let go of the handles, her hands flying back to her body and she slowed to a stop. She held her breath as Tarrant shot forward unsteadily and she saw it coming, shutting her eyes tightly.

She heard the crash and then the string of Underlandian cursing. Opening her eyes she found that her milliner had crash landed in the bushes before a great Tugley Wood. She quickly came over and helped pick him out of the bush. He brushed roughly as this waistcoat and then shoved the thimble that belonged on his left ring finger back into place.

"Is the fun you prefer in Aboveland really from the torture of others on these devices?" He mumbled and pushed his top hat back upon his head.

"You'll get the hang of it, love. It just takes a bit of balance and a lot of patience," Alice said as she placed her hand into her frock's pocket.

"Et be'er beh soon." He eyed the bicycle that was sticking comically out of the bushes, the back wheel was still spinning.

"You can do this, my mad man." Alice wrapped her arms around his left one and kissed him on the neck. "Then we can go bicycling all afternoon and perhaps stop for a lovely picnic." She said with a smile.

Tarrant could only groan in reply. He took the bicycle from among the greenery and placed it back on the road. He straddled the frame once again, placing his left foot on the pedal and pushing forward. Alice cheered him on as he went forward several more feet before hitting a rut in the forest path floor and crashing over once again. Alice quickly came over to nurse his wounds and placed a kiss upon his cheek. "You can do this, Tare." She whispered into his ear.

* * *

The milliner tried and tried again, Alice was afraid that he would never be able to master the craft of bicycling. Until she scolded herself that it was her duty to believe the impossible. After a skinned elbow, a tear in his left knee, a bloody nose, and several cuts, Tarrant was on his twentieth try. He pushed forward and began to pedal, Alice held her breath as he pushed along...and stayed upright. After travelling down the road a bit he pushed back on the pedals, slowing the bicycle and turning to look at her with a wide smile.

"Tare!" Alice said, running to him and throwing her arms about his neck. "You did it love." She placed a kiss on his lips.

He placed his hand about her waist with a proud look about his glowing green eyes. "Tha' Ah di'. Nauw goh an' fetch yehr bicycle an' wehl beh off!"

Alice giggled in response and ran down the lane to grab hold of her own bicycle. She swung her leg over the frame and settled upon the seat. She then pushed off and pedaled toward Tarrant who had already started his way down the road. Alice laugh as the two picked up speed, the wind blowing through her long blonde curls lifting the hair off her sweaty neck. Tarrant seemed to be enjoying himself, though he held onto the handlebars rather tightly.

"You look absolutely marvelous, Lord Hightopp." Alice remarked teasingly. Tarrant could only smile his large goofy grin.

"We'll have to go out tomorrow and picnic." Tarrant replied as he looked to Alice. A look of worry shadowed his face.

"What is it, Tare?" Alice asked in confusion.

"However are we to carry our things if we need both hands to steer?" He looked at his hands that held the bars.

"I have a basket back at home that I can attach to the front," She assured him. "It will be easy. Assuming that you will want to ride tomorrow." She replied.

"And why would I not want to have fun?" Tarrant asked indignantly.

"Much like first learning how to ride a horse- the torture is not quite over." Alice blushed. "You may have a little trouble sitting down later on." She admitted and then sped ahead.

Tarrant let out a groan, cocking his head to the side. He watched as Alice raced ahead and shrugged his shoulders. If the pain was going to be later, not point in delaying the fun now.

With a loud whistle of joy, Tarrant began to pedal harder into the sunlight streaming through the woods hot on the tail of the one person he went through all of this pain and blood for. The one person he would always go through the most uncomfortable situations with. Nothing was as satisfying as the proud look of Alice. And nothing would ever be as fulfilling as seeing his fair one laugh. Every scrape, bruise, cut, and patch on clothes was worth that.


End file.
